Last week I was at the Safeway downstairs looking for some eats. I was near the bakery section where the one public washroom for the Safeway is located. I’ve never been in that washroom before because my home is just upstairs. It being a public washroom though, I can’t imagine being too awesome. Outside the washroom door I saw this dude waiting. I wasn’t sure if he was waiting for his turn or waiting for a friend.
The door suddenly and it seemed urgently swung open a few inches. Someone was talking to the dude but I couldn’t hear what was being said. I could, however, hear the dude’s reply.
“There’s no toilet paper left? Man, hold on…”
From that, I gathered there was a bit of a dire situation going on in there. The dude went around the corner to where a security guard was standing. I heard the dude explain to the guard the washroom was all out of TP. The guard didn’t even seem to care. I couldn’t hear him reply to the dude. The dude did, however, relay the reply to his unfortunate friend in the washroom:
“Hey man, they said they’re all out. Can you use your sock?”
Wow, what a friend dude is. Imagine your friend suggesting that you take one of your socks off so that you can wipe your butt with it. It’s not like they were out in the woods. They were in a freaking Safeway. Hell, the aisle for toilet paper wasn’t even twenty feet away. If I were dude, I would have just gone down the aisle, picked up the cheapest TP I could find, buy it, and bring it to his friend. He did not do that though.
The last thing I saw was an older lady had taken mercy on our mystery friend in distress and was digging through her purse for some loose tissues. I had a feeling though, the situation required more than just a few loose tissues though. If I were dude’s friend, I’d seriously reconsider the friendship. Dude seemed kinda dumb.