THE OUTSIDE

I ventured outside today for more than an hour for the first time since about Christmas Day. I’m still not feeling very well but I had to leave the confines of my apartment because of two reasons. First, I had postponed an appointment to get my haircut on Monday and re-scheduled for today. Second, I discovered this week that I had somehow managed to wear a hole in my bed sheets. I’d like to say it’s from all this crazy monkey sex I’ve been having in my bed but that’s sadly not the case. The hole is three-quarters down from the top of my bed (or one-quarter up from the bottom of my bed if you’re reading this from Australia). This area is suspiciously close to where the heel of my feet wind up when one of my legs is slightly bent. I’m not sure if I’m aware of any repetitive motions I do when I’m sleeping but it’s clear that some sorta of rubbing of the fabric has caused the tear. In spectacular bachelor fashion, these were the only set of sheets I bought for my new bed so they were constantly being washed and then used. I think I’ve learned a lesson here that you should switch between different sets of sheets in order to prolong the life of them. It’s a shame what happened to the fitted sheet, they were 500 thread count and felt almost like silk. I still have the pillowcases so that lessens the blow a bit.

So owing to my haircut and my holey sheets, I had to venture out into the public and the cold weather today. Things got off to an amazing start when I managed to develop a coughing fit not ten minutes into my ride on the Skytrain. I’ve attributed these coughing fits to the sudden changes in temperature, specifically from cold to warm. For some reason going to warm to cold is no problem. So here I am trying not to hack up a lung on public transportation and failing badly. The urge to cough can be such a strong physiological response. It was out of my control. After about five minutes or so, the fit ended for reasons I still can’t figure out. I had another minor coughing problem about ten minutes later but that was it for the rest of the day and evening.

My haircut was uneventful. I had a delightful discussion with my hair cutter. We caught up on our respective holidays, families, and of course, my stupid illness. She mentioned that many people had been rescheduling or canceling this week due to sickness as well. Indeed, as she was finishing up my weave, a young lady came into the waiting area. My stylist said that was her next client and she had also rescheduled due to illness. I watched as the young lady sniffled and politely coughed. This detail has absolutely no bearing on my story but I have to mention my stylist’s next client was absolutely beautiful. Though she might have been sick, she looked great. She did somewhat resemble a girl that was a grade or so behind me in junior high. Ok, let’s get off this creepy stalker tangent.

With my hair new coiffed and styled, I ventured downtown. Now with Boxing Day on Sunday, I discovered that a lot stores had their merchandise picked clean by today. Nearly everyone was still advertising Boxing Day sales but many stores had very little left to offer. I had my eye on a particular sweater at Banana Republic but they didn’t have a single one left, in any colour or in any size at all, at either of their downtown stores. Luckily, the majority of people don’t think of bed sheets when they think of Boxing Day (though I bet some women do), so I was able to pick up another set of 500 thread count sheets for 50% off. I hope this time around, I don’t rub a hole where My Little Pony’s face is.

I have no idea when I’ll be feeling healthy again but I think I’m able to go outside again. Yay! Outside!

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