THE CREDIT CARD SOLICITOR

I’m in the market for a new digital camera since the one I currently own was made in 2002 and is the size of a car battery and requires roughly the same amount of juice. Staples is actually a great place for digital cameras as their prices can be very low. About two weekends ago, I headed down to my local suburban Staples with the intention of buying a particular model.

Upon entering the store, I made a beeline to the digital cameras. I made a quick glance of their selection and to my dismay, the camera I wanted was not there. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone saunter up next to me.

“Looking to buy a new digital camera today?”

I looked over. It was a young dude, probably no more than in his early twenties. He had a nametag on which I didn’t read too carefully.

“Yes actually but the camera I wanted isn’t on sale here.”

“Well, if you do make a purchase today, I hope you consider doing it with our Staples MasterCard. It’s got a really low interest rate and if you sign up today, you’ll get $100 worth of Staples merchandise for free, just for signing up.”

I immediately felt bad for this guy. It was a sunny, beautiful weekend and he was stuck inside a Staples trying to get people to sign up for new credit cards. Was this the only job he could get? Maybe he enjoys it. All I knew was that I wasn’t going to sign up for more debt today.

If it were my father in this situation, he’d just tell the guy flat out no and then dismiss him. I’m not my father, so I can’t just do things like that, which probably explains why things went the way they did from this point on.

“Yeah, I don’t need another credit card. I’m trying to decrease the amount of debt I carry and I already have two credit cards.”

This was of course, all true. Actually, I’m not in debt anymore but hey, I’d like to stay that way and having two Visas is more than enough.

“I understand but our rates are less than five percent for the first six months, with no annual fees, and remember the free $100 worth of Staples stuff. Here, why don’t you take the free $100 card and we’ll get started on the paperwork?”

He held out this card for me to take. This guy wasn’t taking no for an answer just yet.

“No thanks but I have a real problem when it comes to large amounts of credit and temptation. I’ve actually maxed out credit cards buying booze and other expensive items.”

I swear those words just came out of my mouth and I had no idea I was going to say them. It was out there though and I kinda just ran with it.

“I see. You know, you don’t have to buy those things with this credit card. Why don’t you just keep your purchases small?”

“I don’t think this is a good idea. To be honest, I’m a recovering alcoholic and this is making me uncomfortable. I have a real problem with temptation and indulgence.”

“Really?”

The dude didn’t look like he was completely buying it but I think I had come outta nowhere with this stuff that he wasn’t sure what to think.

“Yeah. This isn’t good. In situations like these, I’m supposed to call my AA sponsor and he’s at Cultus Lake with his family. Gee, I better call him now…”

I reached down to my pockets of my shorts to get my phone but before I could, he stopped me.

“Ok, well you have a good day then.”

With that he walked away to leave me in peace and with my credit rating intact. I don’t feel all that bad about lying to him because I’m sure other people are way more rude to him than I was. I just sometimes say no in a different way.

As a final note, I am still looking for a new digital camera.

5 thoughts on “THE CREDIT CARD SOLICITOR”

  1. Oh you DID NOT Erwin tang!Like when Lester Burnham told his boss to stuff it in American Beauty, you are my new hero.-BryBry

  2. I had a pretty girl in Canadian Tire hassle me about their credit card too. I just went in for a litre of motor oil and her sales pitch to me ended up like this:Me – “I really don’t want another credit card.”Her – “Yes you do.”Me – “No, I don’t.”Her – “Why not?”Me – “I just don’t want it.”Her – “Yes you do.”Repeat for about two minutes before she finally glared at me and stomped away like I’d just dumped her.

  3. I think I woulda enjoyed my situation more had it been a pretty girl. Nonetheless, this gives me ideas for the next time…

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