A few weeks ago, I made the realization that I know a lot more people at St. John’s now than I ever did in first term. By “know” I mean I feel comfortable talking to these people, I can ask them relevant questions about their lives, and go beyond random smalltalk.

What really surprised me is how few people I really knew in first term. From September to December, I basically hung around five people. Out of a residence of nearly 200 people, I really only knew five. I remember one Friday night around October or so, I was going to the Village with Lindsay for dinner. On the way, I got her to tell me about some of the people in the College.

“So, do you know who so and so is?”


“Do you know what she looks like, where she’s from, what’s she studying, and where in the College she lives?”


“How about so and so?”

“Well, I think I’ve heard his name before, but I don’t any know anything about him.”

She continued with a list of names, but I gave her similar answers. At dinner, she went on to describe some of the people in the College. It wasn’t even gossip just basic stuff like what they looked like and what they were studying.

It was crazy how few people I knew then compared to now. Rhonda is a really good friend of mine here at the College. We talk everyday, but I can’t remember if we had a single conversation in first term. The first time I really remember talking to her was in late December when we both attended a going-away brunch for someone. On the way home, I sat next to her on the bus, and I was thinking, “So, this is Rhonda, at least I think that’s her name…” So we just started talking.

I have similar stories about how I met other people here. The funniest thing is finding out what people thought of me in first term! I’ve been asking people lately and some of their answers are interesting.

“You were a bit of a mystery to people, no one knew what you were about”

“Someone mentioned you casually, and from that, I thought you were really mean guy”

“Someone once asked me about you and all I could say was, he has a message board on his door”

“All I knew was that you had a picture of Obi-Wan Kenobi on your door and that made you dangerous… you had skills”

“I thought you were gay… still do”

Well, in second term I had way more work than in first term, but I managed to be much more social. This resulted in me getting to know a lot more people. It certainly helped by playing on the ball hockey team. Even though we lost eight straight games, the losing led to some bonding.

I knew I had reached a milestone one day when I was going for dinner. Early on in the year, I always went to dinner with my friends Nic and Marcia. If they weren’t there, I wouldn’t feel as comfortable sitting with others. On that particular day though, I realized it didn’t matter who I was going to sit with, I would feel comfortable with anyone at my table.

I am glad that I feel more connected with the community here at the College now. It would have been a shame to miss out on all the great people that live here.

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