I HAVE MADE THE RAIN GO AWAY

I think with the exception of two days, it’s been raining continuously in Vancouver for about over two months. There’s no need to look at the weather forecast because you’re going to wake up with rain, followed my more rain. Oh the day after that? Yeah, you guessed it Kreskin, it’s more rain again.

This fall and winter, I’ve been facing this torrential downpour with the crappiest of umbrellas. In an earlier post, I wrote about how lost my much beloved Backbone umbrella, given to me by the last company I worked for. My replacement umbrella was this piece of crap that I found lying around. It didn’t have a push button mechanism, so you had to manually open and close it each time. Also one of the arms detached from the fabric so it flapped around in the wind. The kicker was the catch at the top of the umbrella was broken which meant the umbrella didn’t fully stay open.

Well, I went shopping at lunch today and bought myself a proper replacement. I purchased a lightweight, fully automatic umbrella that takes a standard 5.56 x 45 mm NATO round. I might be lying about one of those features. Anyways, this baby clocks in at only 138 grams and about 25 cm. With a one- button press for opening and closing, I’ll be living the high life again.

Now with this kickass new umbrella, I can’t wait to try it out in this inclement weather. Knowing my luck though, now that I’m all excited for the rain, the weather will be nice and dry for the next few days. That’s just how my luck works.

So disregard the latest forecast, it’s sunny skies for all of us.

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