Month: December 2003

A PROMISE TO DO BETTER

I came to the conclusion last week that I’m not satisfied with how I lived the last three months of my life.

In general, I felt like I was just going through the motions. I did the absolute minimum that I needed to do to get by. By that, I mean I did all that was required of me to do get my classwork done. In that respect, I suppose I was satisfied since I did a good job as a TA and I learned a lot in my two classes. Other than that though, I didn’t think I got enough out of life.

One of the most important lessons I learned in undergrad is that you have to live balanced life. It can’t all be school because you wind up looking back and thinking what a waste it was to just have your head buried in a book. It’s vital to do things other than schoolwork.

With this lesson firmly in mind, I made the first year of grad school a success. I am especially proud of my second term, where I had three challenging courses, yet found the time to many things other school. That was the balance that I sought.

Somehow, I forgot that lesson this term. What I am most disappointed with is how I falied to maintain relationships with friends outside of school. My closest friends at SJC last year were Nic and Marcia. They moved out of SJC over the summer and I’ve barely talked to them since their fall wedding. It would have not been impossible to just phone them for five minutes a week. Yet I didn’t even do that. Unacceptable. I met one of friends Ryan in undergrad. Before I went into grad school, we lived quite close to each other and talked quite regularly. I learned through e-mail this fall that he and his young family moved to England. Despite this huge development in his life, I have yet to contact him to see how he is doing. Shameful. I have a friend Raymond who lives in Northern California. He’s left two messages on my voicemail in the couple of weeks. I have yet to call him back. Poor.

Beyond my friends, I used to do a fair amount of baking last year. On average, I’d bake a batch of cookies once a week and distribute them to residents around SJC. It’s a good way to make new friends and see how everyone is doing. I’ve made cookies maybe three times this year. Before the summer ended, I had this cookbook that I want to try out. I thought the fall would be a good time to do that. I’ve done nothing of the sort this fall.

Last year, I had food in my place for the most of the time; things for a late night snack or lunches on the weekend. This year, I’ve rarely had a fully stocked fridge. This is despite knowing it only takes an hour to go to Safeway and come back.

You can also take a look at my web site. Last year, I had updates on a regular basis whenever we had an event here at SJC. Whether it was the welcome dinner, harvest dinner or Halloween, I made the sections for them. You can see for this year, I’ve done none of that.

I really have no excuse. I wasn’t any more busy this term that I was last year. I was just too lazy.

In light of this, I’ve made a promise to do better in 2004. I’d be a fool to continue going through the motions again. I have to wring more out of life than I have.

Here’s to a better and more well-rounded Erwin in the new year.

WEEKEND WALLOW

Well after kicking ass yesterday, it was more like sitting on ass today. I spent the same amount of time studying today, but got half as much done. I guess there’s only so much in the tank at one time. Maybe I’ll go to bed a little earlier tonight and re-charge for tomorrow.

The SJC movie tonight was The Two Towers : Extended Edition clocking in at nearly 220 minutes, I would have loved to view the new footage, but I had to study. I wonder how many people saw the whole thing. I bet they had an intermission.

Today, I found more reason to hate Microsoft. I logged into Messenger in the afternoon upon which I was notified that there was a new version available. Great, I thought. Usually updates are a good thing. So, I download the new version, it installs and I’m prompted to log in again. I enter my info and it boots me back out again. What? I try again. Same thing. Try again. Same thing. Try again. Same thing. Try again. Same thing. Try again. Same thing.

Now, I’m cursing myself for updating, couldn’t leave well enough alone. I get a knock on my door. It’s Sarah. She’s here to deliver some brownies to me. She also tells me that my Messenger is going crazy and that I’m logging in every two seconds. Great.

I check the system reqs for Messenger 6.1 and it’s says I need Internet Explorer 5.1. I have 5.0 because I don’t use IE. So I upgrade to IE 6.0. I try to log into Messenger…. same damn thing. Now I’m getting peeved.

I try to roll back to Messenger 6.0, the version I had before. It takes me a while to find it on the Internet, because Microsoft doesn’t archive their products (like Netscape does). I uninstall 6.1 and install 6.0. By all accounts, this should work. I try logging in again. No dice. Can’t log in.

I briefly think about continuing on with my life without using a messenger client. I come to the conclusion it would be a poorer life. What to do? What to do?

I decide to download Trillian which rolls AOL, Yahoo, and Messenger clients all into one. You lose a bit of functionality, but it the price you pay for all-in-one. I install it and cross my fingers. I attempt to log in… and am met with success.

I can chat again, but I’ve got to do it with this weird Trillian thing. If anyone knows what the hell is going on with Messenger 6.1, you drop me a line.

Ok, I’ll leave you with a bit of Internet fun passed on by Matt Farish. Go to google.com and do a search for the words miserable failure. Tell me what the first item returned is.

WEEKEND WARRIOR

Saturday. Yeah. I made the day work for me. After a less than stellar start to it, I was left dead, dog, and flat-out tired even before noon. I was so tired, I couldn’t even get food for breakfast or lunch. All I could do was sleep for an hour.

Awaking at 1pm, I felt like how the floor of a public washroom looks. Through some stroke of luck or some properly firing neurons, I remembered I had a slice of pizza left in my fridge. After consuming that, I sat at my desk to study. Quickly reviewing my notes, I came to the decision I had slightly miscalculated how much work I’d have to do before my final on Thursday. Whoops.

For some reason, my eyelids felt like they wanted to turn inside out on me. Has anyone ever experienced that? It’s not fun. I fought the desire to sleep with music and tried to work until 2:30pm. That’s when I got myself ready for ball hockey. I’m the unofficial dude at SJC that organizes pick-up ball hockey.

At 3pm, four good Canadian kids from SJC made their way to the parkade where we proceeded to learn we’ve probably been spending too much time at our desks. Don’t get me wrong, it was fun, but I was bent over most of the time like it was prison. Our little skills competition was much more fun and required less running.

We stopped around 4:30pm, and this was when my body made it clear that I had only had a slice of pizza all day. I started get all crazy and I ate some of the brownies I had made earlier. I usually get the sweats and shakes when I don’t eat, but it didn’t happen this time.

I did another hour of work before I had to go to dinner at the Village. It was a lightning quick dinner and I was back by 8pm.

From 8pm to 4am, I laid down the law, I did it up, I got it done, I was a nerd, I blew through two chapters of databases my friend. Sometimes you’ve got to put your head and get things accomplished no matter how tired you are, how hungry you are, or how many other extra-curricular activities are happening at SJC.

I think I maybe still fresh as a daisy right now. Maybe I’ll keep on trucking.

First star to the right, straight on till morning…

SKILLS COMPETITION

It’s really hard to shoot a ball hockey ball through a hole in the concrete in a parkade across 30 feet and into an empty net .

ONE MORE TO GO

Yesterday, I wrote the final exam for my AI class. I was a bit nervous going to it, though I wasn’t sure why. I already had about 50% in the class, so passing wasn’t the problem. There is also this fuzzy area about needing > 67% in your classes to stay in grad school. That meant I needed at least 34 marks (out of 100) to get to that 67% level.

The exam took place in this really, comfy room in the Forest Sciences Centre. It had big tables and nice chairs. We had three hours to complete the exam. I’m guessing that I got 65-70% on the exam, which means I should get an ‘A-‘, but we’ll have to wait and see.

It’s been a while since I’ve had an exam with a three hour time limit and I used almost of that. After I got home, I was very relieved and ready to relax. I took a nap and went to dinner. After dinner, I vacuumed my room, which needed it badly. After that, I helped a fellow SJC resident, Adam, with his video presentation for his CS 544 course. He needed a narrator for his video, so I went over to his room and laid down some tracks. We were debating if I should do it as Robert Goulet or Bill Cosby, but I played it straight.

I made brownies after that. I enjoy baking and I haven’t done enough of that this year. I couldn’t frost my brownies (not a euphemism for anything) until it was cool, so I really had nothing else to do. It was around 11pm and I thought, “I need a beer.”

I knocked on Patrick’s door and good sport as he always is, he obliged me. We went to Koerner’s on campus and had some beer and good conversation. Patrick is a good, dependable friend.

Afterwards, we made our way to McDonald’s for some food. We came back around 1:30am and I wanted to frost my brownies (why does that always sound dirty?) but Chris engaged me in conversation for nearly half an hour.

I went to bed after that and I woke up at noon. It’s nearly 2pm and I’ve done nothing all day, and I really should start studying for my other exam.

I’m feeling and acting like I’m done all my exams, which is a very dangerous thing to do. Ok, I’m going to frost my brownies now.

YOU CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM NOW

So, I did my exam invigilation yesterday. I get to exam room at 8am. There are lots of students outside waiting. I go in. All the exam papers have already been placed on the desks. The instructor comes in and tells me that she and the other TA will be outside checking calculators. I am supposed to stop people from entering the exam room. Great.

I basically sit on my ass for half hour. 8:30am rolls around. The instructor, Daniela, and the other TA, Dana are both from my research lab. Daniela lets the students in. They file in, take their places, and generally look nervous.

Final instructions are given. They are told to start the exam. Dana grabs the class list and starts going around to check IDs. That leaves me with a whole lot of nothing to do. I’m tempted to read my textbook, which I’ve brought, but I’m being paid to be observe the students, not study. So, I start patrolling the two aisles of the lecture hall.

I see nothing out of the ordinary. I can’t answer any questions because it’s been a while since I’ve taken the course, and I haven’t seen the exam, so I don’t know what Daniela has written for the questions. All I can do is point out people to Daniela when they raise their hands. My entire purpose there is to prevent people from cheating.

I go up to the top of the hall and find an empty seat. Damn, this is really, really boring. As Dana goes around to check IDs, she’s also checking that everyone has an authorized cheat sheet. They were instructed to have only a single hand-written cheat sheet. That’s a standard rule which some instructors have. It’s not hard to follow… so I thought. Dana starts finding people who can’t follow instructions. One guy has an entire typed out cheat sheet. Dana confiscates it and takes it away. He looks incredulous. He comes down to talk to Daniela. I can’t hear what he’s saying but he looks to be pleading his case. She’s firm. He walks away, accepting his fate. He no longer has a list of equations that he needs. I hope he has a good memory.

Dana finds two more people like that. How hard is it to write out an equation as opposed to photocopying it or typing it out? Dumb.

As they explore more of the exam, the questions from the students increase in number. I move back to the front of the hall and I’m pointing left and right to people with questions.

I also notice the things people bring into exams. One guy has brought a sheet of plywood three or four feet in length to the exam. He’s got it laid out across three desks to form a “super-desk”. It’s actually quite inventive since these lecture halls have really tiny desks and you usually have several papers to refer to. Another guy has a small Buddha sculpture on his desk. I didn’t see him rub it for good luck, but I assumed he did. Water is a popular item to bring. Some people have coffee, which I wouldn’t bring to an exam. A few people have food too.

About an hour into the exam, the requests for a bathroom run begin. Back in my undergrad days, no one went to the bathroom. You just made sure you were bone dry before and you didn’t leave. Now, people are asking like crazy. We can only let one person at a time leave, so a queue starts up. Dana keeps the line-up in her head.

Up and down the aisles I walk looking for funny business. I see none. I go back to the front and I take a look at the students. I’m about ten years older than most of them. I marvel at how long ten years is, and wonder how fast time has flown by.

There are certainly more women in mechanical now compared to my time. I had one female in my mechanical class, and I went to high school with her. This class was nearly 30% female. That’s incredible. I’m guessing engineering is now a much more attractive option to females now. This is good.

At the 1.5 hour mark or so, Daniela gives me some money to go get some food for all of us. I return with some coffee, tea, and some bagels. Despite my little field trip, I’m still bored.

At the 2.5 hour mark, the exam ends. Daniela tells everyone to stop writing. She doesn’t want anyone to leave until she has collected all the papers. I thought she was going to let me and Dana go around, collect the exams quickly, count them, and then let the students leave. Nope. I was wrong. And here is where it went south.

Instead, she came around to each student, re-confirmed their ID, ticked something off on a sheet and then moved onto the next person. No one could leave until all the exams were in and accounted for. She was spending 15 seconds on average per student and there were over 120 students there. It would take over half an hour just to collect the exams. I quickly realized this and so did many other people. The comments started to fly.

“This is going to take forever.”

“I have another exam at 1pm. I have to go.”

“I need to pee, really, really badly.”

“I need to study.”

“Can I go.”

I sensed a riot in the making, so I let the students go to the bathroom, but told them to come back. Some people started talking, eating, and studying. The rest were getting impatient. A lot of them complained to me. I told them I didn’t make the rules, I just enforced them. I felt sorry for them, I’d never seen anything like this.

Half an hour went by, and Daniela had gotten to the last 20 people or so. Then, by some unheard or unseen signal, everyone just got up and left. They had had enough and I didn’t blame them. The problem was, we hadn’t counted the exams yet. Right.

All the exams came in and I was told I could leave. Total time spent? Four hours. Way too long. I’ve had my fill of invigilation for a while.

STUDY BREAK

I should really be studying but I just had to show you something. It’s a magnet for your door and fridge. I think I may get it.

<img src="http://www.allposters.com/IMAGES/ATA/24708DG.jpg"

CONCERN

I don’t want everybody to get worried, but does anyone realize that the sun isn’t up at 7am? Like shouldn’t someone look into that? How long has this been happening? Geez, it’s so damn early, I’m surprised I’m able to hit these plastic keys in some coherent fashion…

BAH

It’s almost 11pm and I just realized I have to be up in eight hours. That’s insane. How the hell do you early risers live like this? I’m going to be in an ornery mood tomorrow.

“No, you can’t go to the bathroom. I’ll get you a damn cup, go pee in it.”

“What does that mean? How the hell should I know? Maybe you should have studied, eh genius?”

“Dude, you’ve got ten minutes left, if you haven’t got it now, you’ll never get it, do all of us a favour and hand the sumbitch in so I can get some roast chicken in me.”