I apologize for not blogging yesterday but I’ve had a horrendous last 24 hours. I started feeling ill Wednesday afternoon at work. At first I thought it was just a case of heartburn but the discomfort felt lower in my body than usual. I took four anti-acid chews but it didn’t really help. I also didn’t feel hungry at noon which was also unusual.

I ate a small bit of soup anyways and that’s when the real trouble started. After an hour after eating, I had diarrhea, like peeing from my butt type. I knew something was really wrong at that point. About an hour later I peed from my butt again and I started feeling nauseous.

It was at 3pm that I decided I should go home early from work. 3pm by the way is a terrible time to go home, traffic sucks then. I was fine on the way home but as soon as I got in my apartment I started getting the chills. I changed into my PJs and crawled under the covers in my bed. I tried to stay hydrated but even a small sip of water would cause me to run to the bathroom five minutes later. I was losing more water out of my butt than I could replace it by other means.

For most of the evening, I just felt terrible and laid in bed. I couldn’t get any sleep because there was a general discomfort throughout my body that prevented me from falling asleep. As I laid in my bed I watched the sky turn from dark to light as morning came. Around 6am I felt really uncomfortable, went to the bathroom, burped a few times, and then realized my body wanted me to vomit. Sometimes your body won’t give you a choice and the reflex action of vomiting happens automatically. Other times, your body wants to vomit but you can control if you actually do. I decided if my body wanted something out of it that badly, it should probably go. I wretched a few times over the sink and my body then knew this was for real. The soup I had earlier the day came up violently in three separate actions. I could taste it in my mouth and it was in my nostrils. Vomiting is so gross. I was hoping everything that needed to be gone was because I didn’t want to do this again. I blew my nose to get out all the remnants of the soup and vomit.

I returned to bed and I realized I felt instantly better. That general discomfort I felt in my chest had disappeared. It was good enough to allow me to fall asleep for about an hour or so. I woke up extremely parched and I realized I hadn’t peed since I gotten home. I was probably really dehydrated at this point. I gently sipped some water but it was still causing me to pee from my butt.

I wasn’t really in any condition to go to work, so I had to take a sick day. I’ve spent most of the day in bed, trying to stay hydrated. The only time I’m not in bed is when I have to run to the bathroom to pee out of my butt. That’s probably happened at least 10 times today. I’m also amazed at how much liquid is coming out of there. For the amount of liquid I’ve consumed in the last 24 hours, it doesn’t account for how much is coming out. Where is that from?

Things look to be improving though. In the last hour or so I’ve consumed a sports drink with electrolytes and I haven’t had to run to the bathroom yet. It’s too early to tell if I can go back to work tomorrow but I don’t think that will be too likely.

I’ve had to deal with gastrointestinal maladies before and they just suck so bad. Having terrible things come out of your body at both ends is so gross. Some people never experience this and I think they are very lucky people.

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